75 Pick-Up Lines So Funny and Terrible, You're Sure to Get a Smile

Introducing yourself is stressful, but these cheesy openers can help you break the ice.

When you're looking for a relationship—or just see someone who you really want to get to know—there's a ton of pressure to make that first line great. Pick-up lines get a bad rap for being cheesy and cringe-worthy, but if you start your conversation with the right dose of interest and humor, you may end up scoring a date or a number. Introducing yourself to someone new is always scary, whether you're on an app or in-person, since the possibility of rejection is part of the deal. The perfect, knowingly bad opening joke can be a useful way of breaking the tension and the ice. So try one of these pick-up lines on the next object of your affection—just remember to keep it moving if they're not interested.

The best cheesy pick-up lines 

Young man and woman drinking beer and hitting it off at a bar
Monkey Business Images/Shutterstock
  1. Are you wi-fi? Cause I'm totally feeling a connection.
  2. If I had a nickel for every time I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents.
  3. I'd like to take you to the movies, but they don't let you bring in your own snacks.
  4. Are you Australian? Because you meet all of my koalafications.
  5. Know what's on the menu? Me-N-U.
  6. Your middle name must be Gillette. Because you're the best a man can get!
  7. You look so familiar. Didn't we take a class together? I could've sworn we had chemistry.
  8. You and I are like nachos with jalapeños. I'm super cheesy, you're super hot, and we belong together.
  9. Knock-knock. (Who's there?) When where? (When where who?) Tomorrow night, my house, you.
  10. Do you like Star Wars? Cause Yoda only one for me.
  11. Go ahead, feel my shirt. It's made of boyfriend material!
  12. If you were a Transformer you'd be Optimus Fine!
  13. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk past you again?
  14. I'm learning about important dates in history. Wanna be one of them?
  15. I seem to have lost my phone number. Can I have yours?
  16. Are you a parking ticket? Cause you've got fine written all over you!
  17. Did you invent the airplane? Because you seem just Wright for me!
  18. I was wondering if you had an extra heart…because mine was just stolen.
  19. Are you Siri? Because you autocomplete me!
  20. I hope you know CPR, because you are taking my breath away!
  21. If I had four quarters to give to the four prettiest women in the world, you would have a dollar!
  22. Let me guess, your middle name is Gillette, right? Because you're the best a man can get!
  23. Your eyes are bluer than the Atlantic Ocean, and I don't mind being lost at sea.
  24. If you were a burger at McDonald's, you'd be the McGorgeous.
  25. Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile.
  26. Is there an airport nearby, or was that just my heart taking off?
  27. Are you a loan? 'Cause you've got my interest!
  28. I'm in the mood for pizza. A pizza you, that is!
  29. Are you a 45-degree angle? Because you're a-cutie!
  30. You're so sweet, you could put Hershey's out of business!

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The best bad pick-up lines 

Young woman holding phone and laughing
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  1. I'm good at algebra; I can replace your X and you wouldn't need to figure out Y.
  2. I'm really glad I just bought life insurance, because when I saw you, my heart stopped.
  3. If I had to rate you from 1 to 10, I'd give you a 9, because I'm the 1 you're missing.
  4. You must be jelly, cause jam don't shake like that.
  5. You must be a bank loan, cause you've got my interest.
  6. I've got 1-ply, I've got 2-ply, but all I really want is your re-ply.
  7. If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?
  8. If you were a phaser on Star Trek, you'd be set to stun!
  9. Is your name Google? Because you have everything I've been searching for.
  10. Have you been covered in bees recently? I just assumed, because you look sweeter than honey.
  11. There must be something wrong with my eyes. I can't take them off you.
  12. Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only Ten I See.
  13. You must be a campfire. Because you're super hot and I want s'more.
  14. My buddies bet me that I wouldn't be able to start a conversation with the most beautiful person here. How should we spend their money?
  15. Well, here I am. What are your other two wishes?
  16. Remember me? Oh, that's right, I've only met you in my dreams.
  17. You must be made of cheese. Because you're looking Gouda tonight!
  18. I'm glad I remembered to bring my library card. 'Cause I am totally checking you out!
  19. If you were a vegetable, you would be a cute-cumber!
  20. I'm no mathematician, but I'm pretty good with numbers. Tell you what, give me yours and watch what I can do with it.
  21. Are you a time traveler? Because I see you in my future!
  22. If you and I were socks, we'd make a great pair!
  23. Do you work at Dick's? Because you're sporting the goods!
  24. Are your parents bakers? Because you're a cutie pie!

The best funny pick-up lines

Two young men clinking glasses across a table
ProStockStudio/Shutterstock
  1. Are you a long structure used to restrict the flow of water across rivers and underwater streams? Because daaaaaaaaam!
  2. Your eyes are like IKEA. I'm totally lost in them.
  3. How much does a polar bear weigh? I don't know either but it breaks the ice. Wanna get a drink?
  4. Are you my appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me feel like I should take you out.
  5. Aside from being drop-dead gorgeous, what do you do for a living?
  6. Hey, my name's Microsoft. Can I crash at your place?
  7. Kiss me if I'm wrong. But dinosaurs still exist, right?
  8. You owe me a drink. Because when I looked at you, I dropped mine!
  9. Want a raisin? No? Well, how about a date?
  10. You must be a high test score. Because I want to take you home and show you to my mother.
  11. I may not be a photographer, but I can totally picture us together.
  12. You must be a magician. Because any time I look at you, everyone else disappears.
  13. Was your dad a boxer? Because you're a knockout!
  14. I want our love to be like the number Pi: irrational and never-ending.
  15. Is your name Ariel? Cause we Mermaid for each other.
  16. If you were words on a page you'd be the fine print.
  17. I'm writing a term paper on the finer things in life, and I was wondering if I could interview you.
  18. Where have I seen you before? Oh yeah, I remember now. It was in the dictionary next to the word "gorgeous"!
  19. I wasn't always religious. But I am now, because you're the answer to all my prayers.
  20. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put I and U together.
  21. You must be exhausted, because you've been running through my mind all day.
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