Ask anyone who’s tried to calm down a raging toddler, assemble a crust-free PB-and-J, and put clothes on a baby who’s inexplicably covered in tempera paint in the same five minutes and they’ll tell you: parenting is not for the faint of heart. The good news? No matter how hectic, blood-pressure-raising, or how mind-bogglingly bizarre your days trying to raise the next generation may seem, you’re not the only one going through it.
These hilarious parenting tweets prove that, while even seasoned pros can find themselves harrowed and humbled by the day-to-day work of taking care of kids, doing so is still pretty funny in the end. And for more kid-based hilarity, check out the 50 Jokes from Children That Are Crazy Funny!
On Alone Time
On Airplane Etiquette
That feeling of contentment and freedom? Yeah, don’t get used to it. Want more wacky humor? Get a load of the 30 Worst Madame Tussauds Celebrity Wax Figures Ever!
If you’re hoping your kids are going to help with chores, parenthood is going to be full of “happy” surprises. And when you’re in need of a good laugh, look no further than the 30 Funniest Sitcom Jokes of All Time!
Privacy? Yeah, it’s not a thing for parents. Think that’s wild? Wait until you get a load of the 50 Crazy Celebrity Facts You Won’t Believe Are True!
On Dietary Restrictions
Hey, some kids don’t even touch their snacks. And if you want to see parenthood from another perspective, check out the 50 Instagram Accounts That Every Dad Needs to Follow.
Dad and Buried
Sometimes, even your flesh and blood will surprise you.
On Discovering Treasure
Apparently, having a place to live and a savings account aren’t the only ways to prove you’re ready for parenthood.
On Balanced Meals
The adage doesn’t specify that breakfast is no longer the most important meal of the day if it’s just caffeine and sugar.
On Expensive Toys
Parenting lesson: the more you spend on a toy, the less your kids will play with it.
On Being Needed
Reminder: it’s going to take a lot of years before your kids start doing stuff for you.
They make fenced-in yards for a reason.
Want to know if you’ll be a good parent? Practice by mustering up enthusiasm for the same Minecraft video over and over.
On Being Supported
Kids will sometimes be your biggest cheerleaders, but they’ll probably be your harshest critics first.
On Household Duties
On the upside, at least you might get some alone time in the laundry room.
If you want to enjoy re-refrigerating the same food day after day, just pack something healthy in your kids’ lunch.
If you’re thinking of having kids, factor in a supply budget along with that college fund.
Of course, not every kid is cut out for the Ivy League.
On Getting Your Friends to Join
If they told you parenting was going to be more difficult than sniffing newborns’ heads and teaching them how to read, would anyone do it?
Sometimes, it just makes sense to take the path of least resistance, no matter how much your dog hates you for it.
There are only so many hours of the day, and you only get peak Twitter for a handful of them.
At least the fact that Daniel Tiger’s mom seems to routinely forget to put pants on him is pretty relatable.
If you want your kids to get things done, you can do that the hard way, or the way that involves psychological trickery.
On Fiscal Responsibility
It’s all fun and games until that invoice arrives and your kid still doesn’t know Moonlight Sonata.
On Being Cautious
Any parent will tell you that a delayed reaction is still better than no reaction at all.
If you think taking away their screen time made them mad, just wait until you try to make them wear mittens in the snow. Think that’s relatable? Wait until you discover the 30 Things Only Moms With Daughters Know.
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