70+ Eggs-quisite Egg Puns to Crack You Up

We hope you can take a yolk!

Whether you like them scrambled, poached, over easy, or fried, you've got to admit that eggs are one of the best foods around. After all, they're a powerful protein, a simple breakfast, and the absolute bosses of brunch. But in addition to tasting absolutely eggs-ceptional, eggs also offer a ton of opportunities for egg puns. Seriously: all you have to do is find a word that starts with "ex," replace it with "egg," and you're done. Herein, we've plucked together the most egg-cellent examples we could find. So whether you're looking for a funny way to describe everyone's favorite breakfast food or are simply a practical yolker, these egg jokes are bound to crack you up.

RELATED: 80 Cow Jokes That Are Udderly Hilarious

Best Egg Puns

Fried egg isolated on white background
Love the wind/Shutterstock
  1. Who tells the best eggs puns? The comedy-hens!
  2. Where do Eskimos keep their eggs? Inside an egg-loo!
  3. Why did the egg cross the road? To get to the Shell station!
  4. What do you call a scared egg? Terri-fried!
  5. Why was the egg late for school? He didn't study for the eggs-am.
  6. What's an egg's favorite type of coffee? An eggspresso!
  7. Why did the celebrity egg start losing her friends? They called her a shell-out!
  8. How did the hen get to work so fast? She used the eggs-press lane!
  9. What do you call an egg that refuses to come out of its shell? An egg-arophobic!
  10. Why should you be careful what you say around egg whites? They can't take a yolk!
  11. What did the egg say after acing its test? "Omelet smarter than I look!"
  12. Why do people love having hard-boiled eggs for breakfast? They're so hard to beat!
  13. What did the hen say to her chick? "Don't you egg-nore me!"
  14. What is an egg's favorite tree? The might y-oak!
  15. Why did the eggs go to school? So that they could become egg-ucated!
  16. Why did the egg fail its driving test? He liked to egg-celerate too much!
  17. What do you call a mischievous egg? A practical yolker!
  18. What's a hen's favorite shopping company? Federal Egg-spress!
  19. Why don't dinosaurs lay eggs? Because they're egg-stinct!
  20. How do you make an egg roll? Just give it a little push!
  21. What did Snow White name her hen? Egg White!
  22. What happened to the egg after is was questioned by the police? It cracked!
  23. Why wouldn't the farmer let the hen in his house? She kept laying deviled eggs!
  24. What do you call a city with 25 million eggs? New Yolk City.
  25. What does Mr. Egg say every morning to Mrs. Egg? "Have an eggs-tra special day!"
  26. What did the egg do when it saw the frying pan? It scrambled!
  27. How do chickens stay fit? They eggs-ercise!

RELATED: 100 Dog Puns to Make You Howl With Laughter.

Funny Egg Jokes

chicken and egg isolated on a white background representing funny egg puns
Tsekhmister/Shutterstock
  1. What did the doctor tell the chicken with high cholesterol? "Try to lay off eggs for a while!"
  2. How did the chicken feel after a long day on the farm? Eggs-hausted!
  3. Why did the egg hide behind its mom? He was a little chicken!
  4. Where is the best place to learn about eggs? The hen-cyclopedia!
  5. What did the two eggs say after brunch? "Let's hatch a plan for the rest of the day!"
  6. What's an egg's least favorite day of the week? Fry-day!
  7. When is the best time to eat eggs? At the crack of dawn!
  8. What did the egg say to his girlfriend? "You are the hottest chick I've ever seen and that's no eggs-aggeration!"
  9. Have you ever seen an egg crack jokes at a comedy club? They always end up leaving a real mess!
  10. Where do penguins keep all of their chilled eggs? Inside of an egg-loo.
  11. What do you call a smart omelet? An egg head!
  12. What does a meditating egg say? "Ohmmmmmmmlet."
  13. What do you call an egg who likes to go on safari? An eggs-plorer!
  14. What happened to the chicken at school? He was eggs-pelled!
  15. What does a demonic hen lay? Deviled eggs!
  16. What did the chef say after an incredible breakfast? "That was egg-ceptional!"
  17. What's an egg's favorite motivational phrase? "Stay on the sunny side up!"
  18. Why were the eggs running so fast? They were afraid of being beaten!
  19. What did the egg say about escaping the chef? "I might whisk it and run!"
  20. What do you call a self-obsessed egg? An egg-o-maniac!
  21. What's an egg's favorite sport? Running!
  22. Why did the Easter egg hide? Because was a little chicken!
  23. A piece of toast and a hard-boiled egg walked into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here."
  24. What did the omelet say after the breakfast sandwich stole her idea? "That's eggs-actly what I just said!"
  25. Why did the man steal his eggs? He liked them poached!
  26. How did the breakfast burrito find out she was sick? She had an eggs-amination!
  27. Why did the rooster ask the hen out on a date? He was feeling plucky!
  28. How does a hen leave her coop? Through the eggs-it!
  29. What do you think of these egg puns? They are seriously egg-cellent!

RELATED: 77 Bee Puns That Are Un-Bee-Lievably Funny.

Hilarious Egg One-Liners

Hand holding raw egg over isolated white background.
Krakenimages.com/Shutterstock
  1. You're such a rotten egg!
  2. Omelettin' this one slide!
  3. Egg-sactly!
  4. You're so hard-boiled!
  5. Yolk around and find out!
  6. Shell shock!
  7. Stop poaching all my best yolks!
  8. I've got some egg-citing news!
  9. Don't be so soft-boiled!
  10. Whisk it! Whisk it real good!
  11. Time to hatch a plan!
  12. Always look on the sunny side up!
  13. Happy Fry-Day!
  14. Egg-sactly right!
  15. Be egg-tra!

Wrapping Up

That's it for our hilarious egg puns, but be sure to check back with us soon for even more laughs. You can also sign up for our newsletter so you don't miss out on what's next!

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