It's no secret that dogs are some of the funniest (and cutest!) animals out there. They're clumsy. They're clever. They always seem to be smiling (or maybe they're just laughing at their own jokes?). All that's to say that, if there were any animal we're sure would love a good pun, it's dogs. After all, would man's best friend ever leave you hanging on a joke? Definitely not. Read on for the best dog puns of all time. We promise they won't drive you mutts!
RELATED: 109 Funny Puns You Can't Help But Smile At.
Hilariously Short Dog Puns
Best Life- These puns are just paw-ful.
- He's barking up the wrong tree.
- Paws-itively.
- Livin' the pug life.
- Don't stop retrieving.
- Paw-don me.
- Trust me, I'm a dog-tor.
- Who's ready to paw-ty?
- I love you, fur real.
- Friends fur-ever.
- I'm the ulti-mutt dog lover.
- Dog-gone it.
- Anything is paw-sible.
- You're paw-some.
- It's been a ruff day.
- Bone Appetit!
- Oh, paw-lease!
- Come to the bark side.
- That's one sick puppy.
- Howl you doin'?
- She's having a ball.
- Luke, I am your paw-ther.
- Furry hair. Don't care.
- She gets her coffee at Star-barks.
- Su-paw star.
- Central Bark.
Paw-fectly Funny Dog Jokes
Best Life- Looking for some great dog puns? Then paws what you're doing and read these!
- My dog doesn't like to eat hot dogs. It's cannibalism.
- What do dogs drink in the fall? Pugkin spice lattes.
- How do you know a good dog pun from a bad dog pun? The good ones make you bark with laughter.
- What did the dog owner say to her new puppy? "You are so paw-fect. I will love you fur-ever!"
- What happened to the dog who gave birth on the side of the road? She was ticketed for littering.
- New girlfriend? She's already got you on a short leash.
- What kind of car does the dog drive? A Fur-rari.
- The dog couldn't remember where he parked his car in the barking lot.
- What's better than a spelling bee? A talking dog.
- My friend said he once threw a stick two miles and his dog still brought it back… Seems a bit far-fetched to me.
- What did the dog say when he went to the dentist? "I think one of my canines is getting loose!"
- This place seems so fur-miliar.
- Who is the dog's favorite poet? William Shakes-paw.
- What's a pup's favorite book? Harry Paw-ter and the Sorcerer's Bone.
- What do dogs call their parents? Dog-ma and paw.
- What's a dog's favorite movie? Jurassic Bark.
- What did the dog say before he left for work? "Just another day at the paw-ffice!"
- What do dogs eat at the movies? Pup-peroni pizza and pup-corn.
- Where do dogs go when their tails fall off? The re-tail store.
- Is that a new outfit? Because you look absolutely fetching today.
Funny Dog Puns for Birthday Celebrations
Best Life- It's your bark-day so let's woof it up!
- Here’s a round of a-paws for another year around the sun!
- I tried to throw my dog a birthday picnic party, but it quickly turned into a bark-beque!
- If you think I'd forget your birthday, you'd be barking up the wrong tree!
- My dog wanted a pool paw-ty for his birthday. All attendees were good buoys!
- Be-leash me when I say, "Happy birthday to my best fur-end!"
- Keep calm and bark on? I can't—it's my birthday!
- I ordered my dog a birthday present from a cat-alogue. He hounded me about it for a year!
- You're a su-paw star who always nose how to make every day a celebration!
- I'd never miss the paw-tunity to wish you a happy birthday!
- My dog never eats birthday cake too fast. He doesn't bite the hound that feeds him!
- Fur reals, today is your birthday and that's the bone-ified truth!
Holiday Puns for Dog Lovers
Best Life- Santa Paws is comin' to town!
- Rockin' around the Christmas treat.
- Ba Humpug!
- Santa's littler yelper.
- I chews you to be my Valentine.
- Feliz Navidog!
- Happy Howloween! It's going to be a terrier-fying evening!
- Dachshund through the snow.
- Yappy Holidays!
- My dog hates all the fireworks on the Furth of July!
- What do dogs say on October 31st? Happy Hallo-Wiener!
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Funny Puns About Dog Breeds
Best Life- The Dachshund had to sit in the shade because it was a hot dog.
- What do you call a dog who picks a lock? A corg-key.
- Why should you be cautious when it's raining cats and dogs? If you're not careful, you could step in a poodle.
- I'll collie you later.
- I shih-tzu not.
- Mistakes happen. There's no need to terrier self up about it.
- My Dalmatian hid because he didn’t want to be spotted.
- I'm fine, I'm just feeling a little melon-collie today.
- He's doing a thorough Lab report.
- You're such a mal-tease.
- What's a dog's favorite band? The Beagles.
- I like big mutts and I cannot lie.
- Where do dogs like to surf? Colliefornia.
- What do dogs drink in the morning? Earl Greyhound tea.
- What did the dog say to his nagging boss? I told you I'd get it done on time, quit hounding me.
- My dog isn't fat. He's just a little husky.
- What did the Dalmatian say after eating dessert? "Man, that really hit the spot!"
More Cute Dog Puns
Best Life- How are we doing with these dog puns? Some of them are ruff. But a few of them have pet-tential!
- Check out my pooch's new 'do on Vanity Fur.
- With all the pictures I take of my dog, I might as well be the pup-arazzi.
- It's the paw-fect day to spend some time with my furry friend.
- If your pup is cold, he's a chili dog.
- I’m sorry you’re going through a rough pooch today.
- What did the dog say to its valentine? I'm mutts about you!
- Why did the dog go to the club? To raise the woof!
- What did the dog say to his sad friend? "Did you have a ruff day? Let me paw you a drink!"
- Please, give her a round of a-paws!
- She's always the most pupular dog at the dog park.
- Who is the dog's favorite artist? Andy Warhowl.
- What did the dog say to his landlord? "I think we need to renegotiate the terms of my leash."
- Trust me, anything is paws-ible at your age.
- Who is the greatest dog detective that ever lived? Sherlock Bones.
- Do you think he's a bad dog? No, but he is a little ruff around the edges.
- Why was the puppy party so loud? They turned up the sub-woof-ers!
- Why did the dog go to the bank? To make a de-paws-it.
- What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador!
- What did the dog say to his shy friend? "You never stand up for yourself! You just roll over!"
- What did the celebrity dog say when someone took his photo? "Sorry, no pup-arazzi please!"
- What was the sale this week at the pet store? Buy one dog, get one flea!
- Did you enjoy these puns? If so, then thanks fur reading!
This story has been updated to include additional entries, fact-checking, and copy-editing.
