50 Animal Puns That Are Seriously Amoosing
Paws for a second and make sure ewe read these!
If you love animals, then you probably also love animal puns. Because let’s be real: No matter how un-bear-ably bad animal puns are, they’re also seriously amoosing and absolutely hissterical. And you know what? We think that despite the cheesiness, most members of the animal kingdom would agree. So whether you’re in the mood for hilarious zingers or just want to learn a few animal puns to incorporate into your vocabulary, we’ve rounded up the most amoosing animal puns of all time.
Are you on the hunt for some great animal puns?
Then paws what you’re doing and read these!
What did the dolphin say when he made a mistake?
“Hey, I didn’t do it on porpoise!”
Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
Because they lactose!
What did the rodent say as he was leaving work?
“Wow, it’s been a long day. I could really gopher a drink!”
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because they’re shellfish.
Where do sheep go on vacation?
What did the elephant say when he stopped in the middle of telling a story?
“Never mind, I realize this is irrelephant.”
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side!
What did the fish say after proposing an idea to his boss?
“Let minnow what you think.”
Why is the bee’s hair always sticky?
Because he uses a honeycomb!
What did the pony say when he had a sore throat?
“Do you have any water? I’m a little horse.”
Are you annoyed with all these animal puns?
Try coming up with some yourself—toucan play this game!
What did the owl say when he got a divorce?
“Now I’m owl by myself.”
Why was the bird sad?
Because he’s a bluebird.
Which animal will you probably meet on Tinder?
What did the hawk say when he fell off the branch?
“Well, this is hawkward.”
I was going to tell you some animal puns about pigs…
But they’re a little boaring.
What’s a snake’s favorite subject in school?
What’s a dog’s favorite movie?
Harry Paw-ter and the Sorcerer’s Bone
What did the dolphin say when he was confused?
“Sorry, can you please be more Pacific?”
Why didn’t anyone believe the tiger?
Because they thought it was a lion!
How can you make an octopus laugh?
You give it ten-tickles!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What was said during the feline couple’s argument?
“You’re such a cheetah!”
“No, you’re lion!”
Why did the leopard hate playing Hide and Seek?
Because he was always spotted!
What’s so special about your deer?
I have no-eye-deer!
What’s the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can’t tuna fish!
What did the dog say before he left for work?
“Just another day at the paw-ffice!”
Why did the pelican get banned from the restaurant?
He had a big bill and tried to get out of paying.
Why do pandas prefer old movies?
Because they’re black and white!
Why did Mozart end up getting rid of his chickens?
Because they kept saying “bach bach!”
Why did the eagle get arrested for stealing from the doctor?
It was ill-eagle.
What did the dog say before eating his snack?
What’s a wolf’s favorite holiday?
What kind of ducks steal soap from the bath?
What did the cat and dog sing together at karaoke night?
“Don’t stop retrieving… hold on to that feline!”
What do you call it when a cat wins first place at a dog show?
Why was the bear a good fit for the job?
He had all the right koalifications!
Why did the cat go to the vet?
Because he said he wasn’t feline fine!
What do you call a sleeping bull?
Why did the bear leave the restaurant?
He thought the food was unbearable!
What did the giraffe saying to his annoying friends?
“I’m going home! You are all giraffing me crazy!”
Why was the little bear so spoiled?
Because its mother panda’d to its every need!
How did the owl respond when his friend called to say he was running late?
“Don’t worry! Owl wait!”
Why couldn’t the seal stop laughing?
His friend had just told him the sealiest thing!
What did the alpaca say to his overworked wife?
“We’re going on vacation, alpaca your things!”
What’s a cat’s favorite book?
The Great Catsby!
What do you call a dog who picks locks?
Why was the bear wearing a tank-top?
He heard he had the right to bear arms!
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