25 Coffee Puns Guaranteed to Mocha You Smile

The puns you bean waiting for your entire life.

25 Coffee Puns Guaranteed to Mocha You Smile
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Whether you live for your morning latte or drink your brew black as can be, coffee lovers know that a good cup of Joe can turn any day around. (Plus, there are a ton of amazing benefits of coffee, too!) But you know what’s even better than regular coffee? Coffee with a dash of humor. To help you out in that regard, we’re spilling the beans on some of the best coffee puns around. No matter if you’re looking for a morning pick-me-up (after your grandé red-eye, that is) or a caption for your next Instagram, these coffee puns will jump-start your day. And for more jokes that aren’t coffee puns, check out our comprehensive list of the best food puns.

How are excited are you to read some coffee puns?

I can’t fully espresso my excitement!

What’s a barista’s favorite morning mantra?

Rise and grind!

And what should every barista say to their customers?

Have a brew-tiful day!

What do you call a sad cup of coffee?

A depresso.

What did the coffees say before their night out?

Let’s stir up some trouble!

What do baristas say to their least-favorite customers?

You mocha me crazy!

What did the coffee say to its date?

Hey there, hot stuff!

What’s a barista’s favorite exercise at the gym?

The French press.

What’s a coffee’s favorite karaoke song?

Hit Me With your Best Shot!

And what’s its favorite Bob Marley song?

Don’t Worry, Be Frappé.

Why was the coffee-shop worker fired?

He kept showing up in a Tea-shirt.

Why did the coffee call the police?

Because it was mugged.

Why did the coffee bean keep checking his watch?

Because he was pressed for time.

How did the coffee show its love?

It said, “Words cannot espresso how much you bean to me!”

What do you call it when you walk into a coffee shop and feel like you’ve been there before?

Déja-brew.

What did the coffee say about its late assignment?

Better latte than never!

How did Henry VIII like his coffee?

Decap.

How is divorce like espresso?

It’s bitter and expensive.

What happens when two coffee lovers disagree on their favorite roast?

It turns into a heated debate.

How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He drank his coffee before it was cool.

What do you do when your partner drinks your coffee?

I don’t know, but that’s certainly grounds for divorce!

What’s a coffee’s favorite spell?

Espresso Patronum!

What happened when one friend forgot to brew her pal a coffee?

Their friendship came to a bitter end.

What’s the best Beatles’ song to play at a coffee shop?

Latte Be!

What did the two coffee lovers say on their wedding day?

We were meant to bean together!

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