Here's a fun fact for you: Do you know why we call cringe-worthy jokes "corny"? It started in the early 20th century, when mail-order seed catalogs tried to make their boring products shine by promoting them with dad jokes and really terrible puns. Just how bad were these quips about corn? Here's one for you: "What did the corn say when he was complimented? Aw, shucks." Here's another: "What did one ear of corn say to the other? Don't look now, but we're being stalked." What do you think? Pretty corny, huh? Anyway, that's where corny jokes got their name, and the tradition continues today, although they're not exclusive to seed catalogs anymore—and they're rarely (if ever) about farming supplies.
Here are 100 of our favorites, guaranteed to make you laugh, even if the rational part of your brain wants to resist. We promise you, we're not trying to sell you seeds. These corny jokes are just for your enjoyment.
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Best Corny Jokes for Adults
fizkes/Shutterstock- How do you stop a bull from charging?
- What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs?
- Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?
- What is the difference between a poorly-dressed man on a tricycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
- What do you call an angry carrot?
- Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
- What did the horse say after it tripped?
- Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella?
- What do you call a priest that becomes a lawyer?
- What do you call a man that irons clothes?
- How did the barber win the race?
- RIP, boiling water.
- What do you call a pile of cats?
- What kind of music do planets like?
- How did the hipster burn his tongue?
- What do you call a row of rabbits hopping away?
- Why don't they play poker in the jungle?
- Where does the electric cord go shopping?
- Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water?
- What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?
- What kind of tea is hard to swallow?
- Why can't you trust the king of the jungle?
- Why did the stadium get hot after the game?
- What kind of cheese isn't yours?
- I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting larger.
- Why wouldn't the shrimp share his treasure?
Cancel its credit card!
A condescending con descending!
Because then it would be a foot!
Attire!
A steamed veggie!
In case he got a hole-in-one!
Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!
For drizzle!
A father-in-law!
Iron Man!
He knew a shortcut!
You will be mist!
A meow-tain!
Neptunes!
He drank his coffee before it was cool!
A receding hare line!
Too many cheetahs!
The outlet mall, of course!
Because he was a little horse!
"Give me my quarterback!"
Reality!
Because he's always lion!
All of the fans left!
Nacho cheese!
Then it hit me!
He was a little shellfish!
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Corny Dad Jokes
imtmphoto/Shutterstock- Did you hear about the population of Ireland's capital?
- What's a bear with no teeth called?
- What kind of music do mummies listen to?
- How do you make a Venetian blind?
- What do you call it when Batman skips church?
- What would bears be without bees?
- Did you hear about the sensitive burglar?
- Why couldn't the pirate learn the alphabet?
- Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
- What do you call a sleeping bull?
- What’s brown and sticky?
- Why are elephants wrinkly?
- How do you make a Swiss roll?
- How do you impress a female baker?
- What do Olympic sprinters eat before a race?
- What did the yoga instructor say when her landlord tried to evict her?
- How does a rancher keep track of his cattle?
- How many lips does a flower have?
- Why are there gates around cemeteries?
- What’s that restaurant on the moon like?
- What's a pepper that won't leave you alone?
- Where was King David’s temple located?
- What job did the frog have at the hotel?
- What did the cake say to the fork?
- What do you call a group of unorganized cats?
- When does a duck wake up?
- How do you make an egg roll?
- When is a door not a door?
- Why did the baby strawberry cry?
- Why do bees have sticky hair?
It's Dublin!
A gummy bear!
Wrap music!
Poke him in the eyes!
Christian Bales!
Ears!
He takes things personally!
Because he was always lost at C!
Because otherwise they'd be called a bagel!
A bulldozer!
A stick!
Have you ever tried to iron one?
Push him down a hill!
Bring her flours!
Nothing. They fast!
"Namaste!"
With a cow-culator!
Tu-lips!
Because people are dying to get in!
It's OK, but there is no atmosphere!
Jalapeño business!
Beside his ear!
Bellhop!
"Want a piece of me?!"
Cat-astrophe!
At the quack of dawn!
You push it!
When it's ajar!
Because his parents were in a jam!
Because they use a honeycomb!
More Funny Corny Jokes
Liderina/Shutterstock- How do you make an octopus laugh?
- What’s red and bad for your teeth?
- I ordered a chicken and an egg online.
- Why can't you trust duck doctors?
- Why don’t eggs tell jokes?
- What do sea monsters eat?
- How do you make a tissue dance?
- What do lawyers wear to work?
- What did the bartender say to the ham sandwich who tried to order a glass of wine?
- What did one tomato say to the other tomato during a race?
- What do you call an alligator detective?
- What does a baby computer call his father?
- Why did the scarecrow win an award?
- Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer?
- What has four wheels and flies?
- Why did the robber jump in the shower?
- What do you get from a pampered cow?
- How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?
- What did one hat say to the other?
- Why did the restaurant hire a pig?
- Why did the student eat his homework?
- What lights up a soccer stadium?
- Time flies like an arrow.
- How did the duck buy lipstick?
- What has more lives than a cat?
- Why should you avoid products with velcro?
- Why does Waldo only wear striped shirts?
- Why was the man hit by a bike every day?
- What did the termite say after walking into the bar?
- What happens when frogs park illegally?
- Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?
- What did one wall say to the other?
- Why did the kid cross the playground?
- Why did the poor man stock up on yeast?
- How does the moon cut his hair?
- What do you call a fake spaghetti?
- What happens when you witness an Apple store get robbed?
- Why don't melons get married?
- What kind of tree can fit inside your hand?
- What do you call a sleeping dinosaur?
- What do you call a sad cup of coffee?
- How can you identify a dogwood tree?
- How do you organize a space party?
- Why were the fish’s grades bad?
With ten-tickles!
A brick!
I’ll let you know what comes first!
Because they're all quacks!
Because crack up too easily!
Fish and ships!
You put a little boogie in it!
Their lawsuits!
"Sorry, we don't serve food here."
C'mon, ketchup!
An investi-gator!
Data!
Because he was outstanding in his field!
Because he couldn't see himself doing it!
A garbage truck!
Because he wanted a clean getaway!
Spoiled milk!
With a pumpkin patch!
You stay here, I'll go ahead!
Because he was good at bacon!
Because the teacher told him it would be a piece of cake!
A soccer match!
Fruit flies like a banana!
She just put it on her bill!
A frog, because it croaks every day!
Because they're a total rip-off!
Because he doesn't want to be spotted!
Because he was stuck in a vicious cycle!
"Is the bar tender here?"
They get toad!
Because it's pointless!
"I'll meet you at the corner."
To get to the other slide!
To make some dough!
Eclipse it!
An impasta!
You become an iWitness!
Because they cantaloupe!
A palm tree!
A dino-snore!
A depresso!
By its bark!
You planet!
Because they were below sea level!
Wrapping Up
That's it for our list of corny jokes, but be sure to check back with us soon for even more laughs. You can also sign up for our newsletter so you don't miss out on what's next!
