People Are Sharing Hilarious Stories of Their “Jerk” Pets

Even when they're the worst, they're still the best.

People Are Sharing Hilarious Stories of Their “Jerk” Pets
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Pets are the best—and not only because they provide endless companionship and emotional support, but also because they’re a source of constant entertainment.

Cats are like little mischievous villains who love chaos just for the sake of it, and will knock over a glass of water just because they can. Dogs are just silly, and will destroy your couch, then look up at you guiltily as if to say, “Yes, I have done a bad thing.” So even when they make a mess for you to clean up, they’re so cute, you just can’t stay mad at them.

Recently, the writer Talia Lavin asked people on Twitter to share stories about the times they’re pet was a “dumb jerk,” and pet owners around the world really delivered some adorable photos and anecdotes. Read on for the best ones—and for more reminders on the amazingness of pets, Meet the Adorable Dog That Waits for His Owner’s Train All Day Long.

1
When You Know You’ve Messed Up

“Meet Jolene. She ate every one of her dog beds as a puppy.” And for help decoding this expression, check out 19 Things Your Dog Is Trying to Tell You.

2
When You’re Secretly a Genius

“This one opened a closed Tupperware container, ate 3 scones, and closed it back.”

3
When Your Humans Must Live in Fear

“This is Mr. Pugsley. One day he knocked over the trash can and ate the two-day old remains of a smoked paprika roast chicken. We lived in terror of the cooked bones killing him until he turned the bathroom floor into a diarrheic Slough of Despond. He’s a good boy.” And yes, this kind of hilarity is one of the 15 Amazing Benefits of Adopting a Pet.

4
When You Don’t Choose the Thug Life

“Ernestine Justice Shacklekitten the three-legged wonder cat has split my lip on more than one occasion with her aggressive cuddling. ‘My cat gave me a fat lip’ is the [most fake] sounding excuse ever, but, I mean, look at this thug.”

pets are jerks

5
When They Can’t Handle Your Cuddle Game

“My dog is a pit-greyhound mix: Thin body but his head is as hard as a rock. About a week after we adopted him, we were horsing around on the couch. The booger hit me in the face with the top if his head and broke my nose.” For another story about a very good boy, see this Patient Dog Politely Obey Cafe’s No-Dog Rules and Go Viral.

6
When You Have No Regrets

“There were bones from homemade Buffalo wings in the trash can. Sooo….this happened.”

7
When You Feel Bad About Ruining It For Everyone Else But Can’t Stop

“One of my kittens puts his front paws in the water dish whenever he drinks, be-furring the water for everybody else.”

8
When You Need Everyone to Know Who’s the Boss

“Here’s one of my dogs peeing on my other dog. It wasn’t the first time either.” If you love dogs no matter what they look like or how they behave, take a look at these 40 Dogs So Ugly They’re Actually Cute.

9
When You Own the House And the Humans Just Live In It

“This beast insists on being on the dining table at all times and scoots as close as she can to our food while we eat—cannot get her to stop.”

10
When You’ve Made a Booboo

“Stuck.” To learn more about how much dogs need us, Learn the Age When Cute Puppies Are At Their Cutest.

pets are jerks

11
When You’ve Got a Craving

“The two times Ajax has snuck out the front door, he ran 2 blocks and around the corner across two streets to the local burger joint drive-through window for an ice cream. Now we stop by on walks.”

12
When You’ve Got Them Right Where You Want Them

“I’ve encouraged this behavior because i find it amusing but my cat actively stalks me throughout my apartment and waits behind corners to ambush me. Here’s her waiting to ambush.”

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