Skip to content

171 "This or That" Questions to Get to Know Someone

Pull these out at your latest party or get-together to learn more about your friends.

Do you want to easily break the ice and get to know the people around you on a deeper, more significant level? Try asking a few of these conversation-starting "this or that" questions (for adults). It's a fun game that works like this: One person gives the group two options to choose from. Everyone else must make a answer honestly, selecting only one option. ("Both" or "neither" answers don't count!)

The goal of playing "this or that" is to walk away knowing a little bit more about everyone in the circle. And if you get derailed, well, that's perfectly fine. Part of the point is to see what spontaneous conversations evolve out of the game. Below, we've listed some of our favorite questions to ask colleagues, friends, or family members during "this or that." We've also divided them up into categories to make the ones appropriate to your situation easy to find. Now, read on to get started!

RELATED: 184 'Most Likely To' Questions for Couples, Co-Workers, and Friends.

"This or That" Questions for Friends

group of friends laughing outside in response to random "this or that" questions
oneinchpunch / Shutterstock
  1. Scary movies or thrillers?
  2. Pop music or rock music?
  3. Family Guy or Bob's Burgers?
  4. Short hair or long hair?
  5. Reality TV shows or sitcoms?
  6. House party or pool party?
  7. Shopping online or shopping in-store?
  8. Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings?
  9. A loyal friend or a funny friend?
  10. Free lunch or on-site gym?
  11. Bad breath or body odor?
  12. Staying up late or going to bed early?
  13. Bungee jumping or zip lining?
  14. Flats or heels?
  15. Private yacht or private jet?
  16. Going for a walk or going for a bike ride?
  17. Science fiction or mystery?
  18. Taking a dip in a swimming pool or in the ocean?
  19. More time or more money?
  20. Singing or dancing?
  21. An art gallery or an amusement park?
  22. Movie adaptations or books?
  23. T-shirts or tote bags?
  24. Road trip or plane ride?
  25. Jeans or sweats?
  26. Laptop or desktop?
  27. Slot machines or lotto tickets?
  28. Baseball or football?
  29. Cash or card?
  30. Sense of humor or street smarts?
  31. Text or phone call?
  32. Venmo or split the check?
  33. Watching it live or waiting to see it streaming?
  34. Irish accent or Australian accent?
  35. Big earrings or statement necklace?

RELATED: 274 "Never Have I Ever" Questions That Will Spice Things Up.

"This or That" Questions About Food

group of female friends laughing while having lunch / Shutterstock
  1. French fries or onion rings?
  2. Ice cream cone or ice cream sandwich?
  3. Hot coffee or iced coffee?
  4. Milk chocolate or dark chocolate?
  5. Food truck or restaurant?
  6. Brunch plans or dinner plans?
  7. Sour cream or salsa?
  8. Coke or Pepsi?
  9. Cow tongue or octopus?
  10. Beer or wine?
  11. Fast food or dining at a fancy restaurant?
  12. Orange juice or pineapple juice?
  13. Pizza or Chinese food?
  14. Sparkling water or still water?
  15. Crème brûlée or tiramisu?
  16. Take out or home-cooking?
  17. Coffee or tea?
  18. White or wheat bread?
  19. Vanilla ice cream or chocolate ice cream?
  20. Broccoli or Brussels sprouts?
  21. Baked potatoes or mashed potatoes?
  22. Iced tea or lemonade?
  23. Eat ice cream on a hot day or drink a milkshake?
  24. Chicken nuggets or french fries?
  25. Health food or junk food?
  26. Hot dog or hamburger?
  27. American cheese or cheddar?
  28. Pressed juice or smoothie?
  29. Kale or arugula?
  30. Sourdough or focaccia?
  31. Chicken or steak?
  32. Tea or hot chocolate?
  33. Cherry tomato or sun-dried tomato?
  34. Sweet or savory?
  35. Manhattan clam chowder or New England clam chowder?
  36. Lemon or lime?
  37. Burritos or quesadillas?
  38. Balsamic vinaigrette or ranch dressing?

RELATED: 167 Truth or Drink Questions for Adults in Need of Some Fun.

"This or That" Questions in "Would You Rather" Format

group of friends socializing in the backyard asking "this or that" questions
Monkey Business Images / Shutterstock
  1. Would you rather win the lottery or pursue your dream job?
  2. Would you rather own a theme park or your own zoo?
  3. Would you rather have a rich friend or a best friend?
  4. Would you rather watch a funny movie or a documentary?
  5. Would you rather visit the International Space Station for a week or spend a week in a hotel at the bottom of the ocean?
  6. Would you rather have a big party for your birthday or celebrate with just a few friends?
  7. Would you rather play sports or watch a movie?
  8. Would you rather have a personal chef or a personal trainer?
  9. Would you rather go out to a bar or stay in for a movie night?
  10. Would you rather get the silent treatment after an argument or yell it out in the moment?
  11. Would you rather have 10 siblings or be an only child?
  12. Would you rather spend your entire life doing what you love or spend it with the people you love?
  13. Would you rather have a photographic memory or an IQ of 200?
  14. Would you rather work on a solo project or participate in a team-building assignment?
  15. Would you rather be the smartest person in the room or the richest person in the room?
  16. Would you rather play a multi-player video game or a single-player video game?
  17. Would you rather take a class or give a class?
  18. Would you eat something from Fear Factor to win a million dollars or rob a bank?
  19. Would you rather have only Zoom meetings or only in-person meetings at work?
  20. Would you rather always say everything on your mind or never speak again?
  21. Would you rather be a kid your whole life or an adult your whole life?
  22. Would you rather always be hot or always be cold?
  23. Would you rather wear itchy clothes or clothes that are too small?
  24. Would you rather go on vacation with your least favorite family member or the worst boss you've ever had?
  25. Would you rather get a blister on your foot or a canker sore in your mouth?
  26. Would you rather work a desk job or work with your hands outside?
  27. Would you rather have no eyebrows or no eyelashes?
  28. Would you rather live in Antarctica or the Sahara Desert?
  29. Would you rather be known as a one-hit wonder for a novel or a song?
  30. Would you rather have the details of your financial life or your love life made public?
  31. Would you rather have 12 children or no children?
  32. Would you rather have X-ray vision or magnified hearing?
  33. Would you rather go on vacation with friends or with your spouse?

RELATED: 76 Family Feud Questions and Answers for Your Next Game Night.

"This or That" Questions for Kids

little girl sitting on her fathers shoulders and next to her mother
Rido / Shutterstock
  1. E-learning or classroom learning?
  2. Computer game or board game?
  3. Wonder Woman or Captain Marvel?
  4. Mobile games or console games?
  5. Math class or art class?
  6. Eating at home or at a friend's house?
  7. Shrek or Kung-Fu Panda?
  8. Keyboard or piano?
  9. Musical or play?
  10. Old books or new books?
  11. Jokes or pranks?
  12. Video games or computer games?
  13. Sticky hair or no hair?
  14. Boogers or eye gunk?
  15. Toy Story or Cars?
  16. Animals or insects?
  17. Scary ghost story or a haunted house?
  18. Christmas Eve or Christmas Day?
  19. Indoors or outdoors?
  20. Read or watch TV?
  21. Water balloon fight or snowball fight?
  22. Play alone or play with others?
  23. IMAX movie or a 3D movie?
  24. Bumper cars or miniature golf?
  25. New phone or new computer?
  26. Avengers or Justice League?
  27. Blue skin or purple tongue?
  28. Musical theater or gym class?
  29. Animated movie or an action movie?
  30. Disney or Nickelodeon?
  31. Elsa or Anna?
  32. Netflix or Disney+?
  33. Teacher's pet or homecoming court?
  34. School lunch or packed lunch?

RELATED: Trick Questions (With Answers!) That Will Completely Bend Your Mind.

"This or That" Questions for Couples

woman getting a piggyback from her boyfriend
  1. Date night out or date night in?
  2. Gifts or quality time?
  3. Vacuuming or doing dishes?
  4. Cats or dogs?
  5. Kids or no kids?
  6. Natural face or make-up?
  7. Carpet or hardwood floors?
  8. History museum or art museum?
  9. Bar soap or shower gel?
  10. Share drinks or share food?
  11. Work for a company or be your own boss?
  12. Toilet paper that goes over or under?
  13. Nature walk or a trip to the gym?
  14. Grandma or Nana?
  15. Grandpa or Papa?
  16. Van or SUV?
  17. Public or private proposal?
  18. Buy our dream house or buy our dream car?
  19. Long-distance or breakup?
  20. Early morning or late night?
  21. Get married after 15 weeks or wait 15 years?
  22. Flowers or chocolates?
  23. Hugs or kisses?
  24. Massage or cuddle time?
  25. Candle-lit dinner or dancing?
  26. Dress up or dress down?
  27. Lake or ocean?
  28. Formal date night or keep things casual?
  29. Clean the kitchen in the morning or at night?
  30. Outdoor grilling or indoor BBQ?
  31. Friends or Seinfeld?


What are "this or that" questions?

Unlike board games, "this or that" is a conversational activity. These questions require participants to choose one of two options, giving those they're engaging with a better sense of who they are and what their preferences may be. Consider bouncing from deep questions to funny questions and back to keep the game informative, but fun.

How do you turn "this or that" questions into a game?

It's easy! To play, you simply ask those you're with to choose between two options. You don't need to explain your questions, either For instance, you can ask, "Iced or hot coffee?" Anyone playing will have to answer with no more than two words, informing the other players—you guessed it—whether they like their coffee hot or iced.

Wrapping Up

That's it for our list of "this or that" questions! Be sure to check back with us soon for more ways to break the ice. You can also sign up for our newsletter so you don't miss out on what's next!

Carrie Weisman
Carrie Weisman oversees all SEO efforts at Best Life. She specializes in content optimization and editorial marketing. Read more
Filed Under