5 Things You're Doing as a Couple That Make Other People Uncomfortable
Experts give their insight on the couple behavior you may want to avoid going forward.
When you're in love, it can sometimes feel like you and your partner are the only people in the world. For better or worse, that is simply not the case, however, and you don't want to let yourself become blind to those outside your bubble. If you're not careful, you could put your other relationships in jeopardy. Talking to experts, we gathered some insight on behaviors you and your partner may want to reconsider. Read on to discover five things you could be doing that are making other people uncomfortable.
Flirting with someone other than your partner
When entering into an exclusive relationship, you and your partner are not just making the promise of fidelity to each other. That commitment is also something that other people are probably considering, too—and breaking it in public can cause serious confusion.
Nancy Landrum, MA, author, relationship coach, and creator of the Millionaire Marriage Club, tells Best Life that it's uncomfortable for others to see a person they know is in a relationship flirting with someone who is not their significant other.
"This is embarrassing for your partner, but even worse, a public demonstration of poor integrity," she says. "Whether it's just a bad habit to feed your ego or a deliberate way to get back at your partner for some slight, flirting at any time with any person other than your beloved compromises the strength of your love."
Talking excessively about your life together
Of course, people want to know you and your partner are doing well. But there is a thin line between sharing your happiness with others and throwing your relationship in their faces.
Jennifer Kelman, LCSW, a mental health expert and licensed psychotherapist on JustAnswer, advises couples to avoid going on and on about their life together, because it can easily come across as bragging.
"Certainly share some wonderful things, but don't let that be the thing that monopolizes all conversations," she says. "Be mutual in your interest in the other couple or family members and be sensitive to how others receive the information or how things are for them in their lives."
This also applies to bragging about your kids too much! Couples who can only talk about the accomplishments of their children and nothing else "can be a drag to be around," according to Kelman. And even if you don't have any yet, you should still be conscious of your conversations.
"Discussing plans about kids or your future as a couple can make other people uncomfortable," warns Kevin Mimms, LMFT, a private practice therapist working with Choosing Therapy.
Fighting in public
We've all likely overheard our fair share of romantic squabbles while out and about. But emotionally elevated disagreements are "not appropriate for public display," according to Landrum.
"If a disagreement is about to turn ugly, agree to table it until you are alone," she advises. "And if fighting is a frequent experience in your relationship, get effective help to learn better communication and conflict management skills."
It's even more troublesome if you're fighting with your partner in front of your friends, Kelman warns.
"People want to get together with other couples and enjoy good times and not have to hear about the tough stuff or play referee," she explains. "Leave the grievances at home and work on things at a different time and certainly do not put your friends in a position where they are asked to offer a view about who is wrong or right."
Making jokes at each others' expense
You don't have to be full-out fighting with your significant other to cause discomfort, however.
"Similar to arguing in front of others, putting your partner down, even if it's a 'joke,' is not funny and not the thing to do in front of others," Kelman shares. "It can surely put all parties in a place of unease, and you don't look like the good guy by putting your partner down in front of friends or family members."
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Packing in the PDA
This one may seem more obvious, yet many couples still end up overdoing their public displays of affection—otherwise known as PDA. Being "overly lovey-dovey" with your partner may easily make you unbearable to be around, according to Kelman.
"It could make people uncomfortable because they may feel it should be more private and not on display for the world to have to watch," she explains. "It may also make people uncomfortable as it could tap into their own insecurities and feelings about their own relationship and lack of intimacy."