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Survey Says This Is the Sexiest Thing You Can Say to Someone

No, it's not what you think it is.

When it comes to sex, actions definitely speak louder than words. And, indeed, a recent survey of 2,000 Americans by the sex toy retailer found that some of the biggest turn-ons in bed include little things like kissing someone on the neck, nibbling on the ear, and eye contact.

But the survey also identified the three little words that seems to really get people going, and it's not "I love you." According to the respondents, hearing someone say "I like that" when you do something in bed is a major aphrodisiac, which makes sense, since there's nothing better than knowing that you're giving your partner pleasure.

Perhaps that's why both giving and receiving oral sex was also on the list. And, interestingly enough, it seems like men find administering oral sex even more sexually appealing than women do, given that 76 percent of men listed it as a turn-on, versus only 56 percent of women.

For what it's worth, it seems like being teased is slightly more of a turn-on for women than men, which will hopefully inspire guys to engage in a little more foreplay instead of going straight for the gold.

The survey also included some of the biggest turn-offs, like bad hygiene, eating with your mouth open, talking about exes, flirting with other people, acting insecure, dressing poorly, not listening well, and behaving arrogantly. One of the biggest turn-offs was being mean or rude to waitstaff, thereby adding to recent evidence that, contrary to what you've been told, being a "bad boy" doesn't get you any extra points in bed, and being generous and conscientious as a man is actually a major turn-on.

The study is also interesting in that it adds to a growing body of research that shows that, as nice as it may be to look at a pack of six-abs, sexual attraction is based on someone's behavior more so than their physical appearance.

"The study showed that non-physical affections are the biggest turn-ons for everyone," Fred Petrenko of told The New York Post.

And it seems like acting aloof isn't as effective as pop culture has made you think, since some of the other big turn-ons for both men and women included being affectionate (64 percent) and making someone feel appreciated (61 percent). To be clear, while giving compliments and showing interest in the other person is a turn-on, baby-talk was listed as a major turn off.

Another interesting result of the study indicated that 37 is when people tend to be at their kinkiest, and that there's no need to think sex is an evening-only activity. In fact, the survey results found that the time of day when Americans are most likely to be turned on is at 2:46 p.m. Sadly, most of us are at work then, but if you're not, there's no reason not to engage in a little afternoon delight. And for more non-sexual gestures that really get the mood going, check out the 30 Things Men Do That Women Always Find Sexy.

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Diana Bruk
Diana is a senior editor who writes about sex and relationships, modern dating trends, and health and wellness. Read more