30 Hilariously Bad Celebrity Signatures

Angelina, are those hieroglyphics?

30 Hilariously Bad Celebrity Signatures
circle

Everyone’s signature, like an inky snowflake, is different. But some signatures tend to garner more attention than your everyday signed check—namely, celebrity autographs. Because there’s no formula for perfection—and because these people likely get asked every day to hand over their Hancock—many A-listers have signatures that look more like a toddler’s chicken scratch than an adult’s namesake.

Authors and artists, actors and actresses, auteurs and athletes—celebrities from all walks of life can’t seem to nail down the simply art of writing one’s name. For proof, read on. We’ve rounded up the most egregiously illegible signatures on the planet. You’ll never feel bad about your own ever again. And for more hilarious A-lister trivia, don’t miss the 30 Wildly Entertaining Photos of Celebrities Using Public Transportation.

Christina Aguilera Bad Signatures Image via Wikimedia Commons

1
Christina Aguilera

The pop star might kill it on the stage and in the studio, but, as this toddler-like scribble shows, she’s still got a ways to go with a pen and paper.

Michelle Williams Bad Signatures Image via eBay

2
Michelle Williams

Michelle Williams: Big screen beauty, Dawson’s Creek dame, and scribbling extraordinaire.

Mel Gibson Bad Signatures Image via Wikimedia Commons

3
Mel Gibson

Mel Gibson puts passion into every one of his performances, but the same can’t be said of the actor’s autographs.

Will Smith Bad Signatures Image via eBay

4
Will Smith

He might be able to assassinate aliens and survive the apocalypse, but if there’s one thing Will Smith can’t do, it’s write his own name. And for more hilarious celebrity antics, check out these 25 Funny Pranks from the Sets of Your Favorite Movies.

Paris Hilton Bad Signatures Image via Hollywood Memorabilia

5
Paris Hilton

Given how ubiquitous the Hilton name is, you’d think that Paris Hilton would actually know how to write it.

Picasso Image via Wikimedia Commons

6
Pablo Picasso

Pablo Picasso is well-known for interpretive artwork that lines the walls of museums and private galleries around the world. It looks like his signature is “interpretive,” too.

Robert Pattinson Bad Signatures Image via Ebay

7
Robert Pattinson

Robert Pattinson made it big after scoring the lead role in the Twilight series. But despite the sheer amount of autographs the actor had to sign during the franchise’s heyday, it seems he still doesn’t quite understand the difference between his name and a straight line.

David Bowie Bad Signatures Image via eBay

8
David Bowie

David Bowie was one of the best songwriters of a generation—but, though the musician wrote countless timeless hits, he never quite managed to write a legible autograph.

Angelina Jolie Bad Signatures Image via eBay

9
Angelina Jolie

Angelina Jolie may bring an irresistible magnetism to every role—assassin, hacker, tomb raider—but the simple task of writing her own name eludes her. As you can see, this chicken scratch looks like it was unearthed from an ancient tomb.

Tim Cook Bad Signatures Image via Wikimedia Commons

10
Tim Cook

Apple executive Tim Cook is a technology whiz, after all, so it figures that using a pen and paper is a skill that he’s long forgotten.

Jason Statham Bad Signatures Image via Hollywood Memorabilia

11
Jason Statham

Let’s be honest: Action star Jason Statham is far too busy chasing down bad guys to stop and sign legible autographs.

Heath Ledger Bad Signatures Image via eBay

12
Heath Ledger

Heath Ledger might have given his all to every role he ever undertook—he’s arguably the best Joker the world has ever seen—but his signature looks more like a kindergartener’s doodles than a once-in-a-generation actor’s autograph.

J.K. Rowling Bad Signatures Image via eBay

13
J.K. Rowling

Maybe if J.K. Rowling had a magical wand to sign autographs, then her signature wouldn’t be so illegible. And if you love Harry Potter, then check out the 35 Ways Harry Potter Is Still Crazy Relevant.

Sylvester Stallone Bad Signatures Image via eBay

14
Sylvester Stallone

Tough guys just want to be misunderstood, and, with this mysterious text, actor Sylvester Stallone certainly attained that.

Val Kilmer Bad Signatures Image via Ebay

15
Val Kilmer

The Top Gun actor didn’t even try with this one.

Meryl Streep autograph Image via eBay

16
Meryl Streep

Meryl Streep’s acting career should speak for itself, so there’s no need to decipher this chicken scratch.

Thom Yorke Bad Signatures Image via eBay

17
Thom Yorke

Thom Yorke has managed to leave a serious mark on the music industry, both through his main act, Radiohead; his side gig, Atoms for Peace; and his solo work. Put his name to paper, though, and that seriousness disappears.

Derek Jeter Bad Signatures Image via eBay

18
Derek Jeter

Now that legendary New York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter is retired, he’ll have plenty of time to work on his signature.

Mariah Carey Bad Signatures

19
Mariah Carey

Sure, she can hit the high notes, but can she spell her own name?

Al Pacino Bad Signatures Image via eBay

20
Al Pacino

The Godfather actor’s signature conveys a quiet deviousness—similar to what Pacino brought to the screen.

Johnny Depp Bad Signatures Image via eBay

21
Johnny Depp

This incredibly accomplished actor is too busy jetting around the world to worry about his penmanship.

Mark Zuckerberg Bad Signatures Image via Wikimedia Commons

22
Mark Zuckerberg

The CEO of Facebook, just like the rest of us, yearns to convey importance in his signature. Though, unfortunately for Mark Zuckerberg, this one conveys nothing more than confusion.

Leonardo Da Vinci Bad Signatures Image via Wikimedia Commons

23
Leonardo Da Vinci

Like any other great work of art, one must turn their head in every direction to truly see the hidden message in the legendary painter’s signature.

Usher Image via eBay

24
Usher

A question: Isn’t Usher only one word?

 

Jacob Lew Bad Signatures Image via Wikimedia Commons

25
Jack Lew

Given that his signature is on every single piece of paper currency in the United States printed from 2013 to 2017, you’d think that former U.S. Secretary Treasury Jack Lew would want his name to be a bit more legible.

Keanu Reeves Image via eBay

26
Keanu Reeves

While Keanu Reeves is skilled on the big screen, displaying impressive driving feats and “gun-fu” skills in films as disparate and groundbreaking as John Wick and The Matrix, his autograph efforts are less than impressive.

Lady GaGa Bad Signatures Image via Ebay

27
Lady Gaga

Lady Gaga might be a pop icon that teens everywhere look up to, but nobody should try and copy her chicken scratch signature.

Tom Hanks Image via eBay

28
Tom Hanks

Actor Tom Hanks’ signature is like a box of chocolates: you never know what you’re going to get.

John F. Kennedy Image via Wikimedia Commons

29
John F. Kennedy

While John F. Kennedy may have handled other presidential matters with ease and accuracy, it’s clear that perfecting a signature was the least of his worries in the White House.

Wes Anderson Image via eBay

30
Wes Anderson

It’s safe to assume that director Wes Anderson doesn’t jot down his movie plots in the same handwriting that he writes his signature in—otherwise, there’d be no movie. And calling all film buffs: don’t miss the 50 Iconic Movie Roles That Almost Went to Someone Else.

To discover more amazing secrets about living your best life, click here to sign up for our FREE daily newsletter!

Filed Under
Best Life
Live smarter, look better,​ and live your life to the absolute fullest.
Get Our Newsletter Every Day!
Enter your email address to get the best tips and advice.
close modal
close modal
GET YOUR FREE GIFT
SUBSCRIBE