94 Shower Thoughts So Weird, Your Mind Might Break

Ever zoned out in the shower, only to be resuscitated by an exceedingly random thought? You're not alone. These miniature epiphanies are also known as shower thoughts, and they happen more often than you would think. So often, in fact, that they even attracted the interest of a few academics over at the University of Virginia.

Back in 2022, these researchers released a study confirming that rote activities like showering really do lend themselves to creative thought. They call it the shower effect, and it basically means people are more likely to come up with new ideas when their mind is allowed to wander.

If that's not enough to sell you on the idea, then maybe the internet will. The phenomenon has seriously rocked the online community. There's actually a subreddit with over 26 million members dedicated to shower thoughts, making it one of the largest threads on the entire site. If you're curious about what's being discussed, be sure to read on.

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94 of the Greatest Shower Thoughts the Internet Has to Offer

Check out the list below for our favorite funny, weird, and downright deep thoughts that may or may not have already occurred to you in the shower. We've even broken things down by category to make things even easier to navigate.

Funny Shower Thoughts

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1. As a kid, my parents taught me to not believe everything I see on TV. Now, I have to teach them to not believe everything they see on Facebook.
2. If ghosts can walk through walls, why do they bother with doors?
3. Why do we call them "fingers" if we don't actually "fing" with them?
4. Nothing is on fire, fire is on things.
5. Accidentally liking someone's post while snooping through their profile is the digital equivalent of stepping on a twig while sneaking through the forest.
6. "Go to bed, you'll feel better in the morning" is the human version of "Did you turn it off and turn it back on again?"
7. The Olympics is the only time you'll hear, "Great execution by North Korea."
8. If my calculator had a history, it would be more embarrassing than my browser history.
9. Tobacco companies kill their best customers and condom companies kill their future customers.
10. Depression is like being in an emotionally abusive relationship with your brain.
11. If the movie Honey, I Shrunk the Kids took place in Australia, those kids would have died real quick.
12. Your stomach thinks that all potatoes are mashed.
13. If aliens come to earth, we will have to explain why we made dozens of movies in which we fight and kill them.
14. If time is an illusion, does that mean our showers are never-ending?
15. Why do we say "I slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?
16. If you're in a virtual reality, how do you know you're not just in another person's dream?
17. If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound or just a bunch of tweets?
18. The person who proofread Hitler's speeches was an actual grammar Nazi.
19. Why do we put our pants on one leg at a time, but take them off two legs at a time?
20. If someone from the past suddenly appeared today, what would be the most difficult thing to explain to them—the internet or avocado toast?
21. UPS will leave a $900 video card on my porch without even knocking but I have to sign for a $10 pizza.
22. If Apple owned the ISS it would spell disaster for other spacecraft that wanted to dock with it.
23. A successful marriage ends with watching the other person die.
24. There should be a millennial edition of Monopoly where you just walk around the board paying rent, never able to buy anything.
25. Why do we say "heads up" when we really mean "heads down"?
26. Why do we park in driveways and drive on parkways?
27. Why do we call it a "building" if it's already built?
28. Last night my friend asked to use a USB port to charge his cigarette, but I was using it to charge my book. The future is stupid.
29. If ghosts can't be seen, how do we know what they look like?
30. Why do we call it "taking a dump" when we're actually leaving one?
31. If we're all made of atoms, does that mean our bodies are just really expensive real estate for subatomic particles?
32. When you drink alcohol, you are just borrowing happiness from tomorrow.
33. If the universe is expanding, does that mean our problems are, too?
34. Why do we call it a "computer mouse" when it has nothing to do with mice?
35. Brushing your teeth is the only time you clean your skeleton.
36. Why do we call it a "smartphone" when we're the ones doing all the work?

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Deep Thoughts for in the Shower

37. If the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
38. Most people aren't scared of being alone in the dark—they're scared of not being alone in the dark.
39. Whenever you dig up dirt or a rock, that could be the first time it has seen the sun in millions of years.
40. A different version of you exists in the minds of everyone who knows you.
41. If heaven exists, it’s probably going back and doing your life over, but fixing all your mistakes.
42. If time is an illusion, what does that mean for the concept of cause and effect?
43. Is life a never-ending cycle of birth, death, and rebirth?
44. The richest person on Earth is technically also the richest person in the universe, since our definition of rich is owning a lot of Earth money, and there's no way for extraterrestrial life to obtain it.
45. Taxes are like a subscription to your country that you can't cancel, no matter how bad the service gets.
46. If the universe is infinite, does that mean there's an infinite number of parallel universes?
47. Once we have self-driving cars, wipers will no longer be essential, because the car doesn't need a clean windshield to drive. Only humans do.
48. Are our thoughts and actions predetermined, or do we have free will?
49. My dog understands several human words. I don’t understand any dog barks. He may be smarter than me.
50. Is it possible to achieve true happiness, or is it just a fleeting state of mind?
51. What is consciousness, and how does it arise from the physical world?
52. Is the universe deterministic, or is there room for randomness and chance?
53. Are there other intelligent life forms in the universe, and how would that change our understanding of ourselves?
54. Why do we have memories, and what purpose do they serve in our lives?
55. Is there a connection between our individual consciousness and the collective consciousness of humanity?
56. We should have a holiday called Space Day, where lights are to be shut off for at least an hour at night to reduce light pollution, so we can see the galaxy.
57. What is the meaning of art, and why do we create it?
58. Someone out there vividly remembers something you said that you have completely forgotten.
59. On any given day in a hospital, you can find people having the best day of their life, the worst day of their life, the first day of their life, and the last day of their life—all under one roof.
60. You may have once made a decision that saved your life without knowing it.
61. You see people every single day that you'll never see again.
62. Is it possible to truly know someone else's thoughts and feelings, or are we limited by our own subjective experiences?
63. Handcuffing deaf people takes away their freedom of speech.
64. Academic grades are strange in that while you’re in school they are the most heavily weighted indicator of your potential, but they are never considered important after your first job post-school.
65. What is the significance of dreams, and do they hold any deeper meaning?
66. Is it possible to know everything, or is there always something left unknown?

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Confusing Thoughts to Have in the Shower

Shutterstock / Lopolo

67. If we're always moving forward in time, does that mean we're always getting older?
68. One day you are going to think of someone for the last time and never know.
69. A true mad scientist would only destroy half of the earth since the other half is the control group
70. Every word in every language started out as gibberish until one person convinced enough people that what they said was a real word.
71. Why do we call it "falling asleep" when we're actually lying down?
72. If everything is relative, how can anything be certain?
73. When Sweden plays Denmark, it is SWE-DEN. The remaining letters, not used, are DEN-MARK.
74. People cover their laptop cameras for fear of hackers, but never their phone cameras.
75. One day you'll be someone’s ancestor.
76. Randomly hearing your favorite song on the radio is more satisfying than playing it directly from your iPod.
77. To fall asleep, you have to pretend to be asleep.
78. “Do not touch” would be scary to read in braille.
79. Whenever you eat canned pieces of fruit, you are more than likely sharing one whole fruit with someone hundreds of miles away.
80. You’ve never been in an empty room before.
81. We know more about space than we do what’s deep in the ocean.
82. Your shadow is a confirmation that light has traveled nearly 93 million miles unobstructed, only to be deprived of reaching the ground in the final few feet thanks to you.
83. “Live” is just “evil” spelled backward.
84. Theme parks can snap a crystal clear picture of you on a roller coaster at 70 mph, but bank cameras can't get a clear shot of a robber standing still.
85. What if oxygen is poisonous and takes 75-100 years to kill us?
86. One day you will hear your name for the last time
87. How do we know for sure if other people are alive like we are?
88. Being alive is basically just being in an endless conversation with yourself.
89. If your shirt isn’t tucked into your pants, are your pants tucked into your shirt?
90. Why is bacon called bacon and cookies called cookies when you cook bacon and bake cookies?
91. Lawyers hope you get sued, doctors hope you get sick, cops hope you're a criminal, and mechanics hope you have car trouble. Only thieves want to see you succeed.
92. If you’re over 30 years old, you are older than (almost) every cat and dog in the entire world.
93. How does a sponge hold water when it’s full of holes?
94. Why do we say "I'm lost" when we're actually just not found yet?

Wrapping Up

That's it for our list of shower thoughts, but be sure to check back in with us soon! You can also sign up for our newsletter to enjoy similar kinds of content, as well as hit pieces on health, entertainment, and travel.