Instagram trends have come a long way from the simple days of duck face and #iwokeuplikethis. Nowadays, you need to some sort of hook in order to really get people’s attentions in this narcissistic netherworld, and some of the most popular selfie rituals of 2017 include doing squats with your dog, posing like Bambi, taking a #divorceselfie with your ex, and posting a photo of something from your Instagram story so that it’s already layered with text and emojis and what the temperature is that day.
But one emerging trend, first noted by Elle, that we can definitely get behind is taking selfies while adorably eating a bowl of pasta.
And it’s not just anyone that’s taking selfies with pasta, it’s glamorous women with an 18.5 BMI and a little blue check next to their names to indicate that they are important and at least somewhat famous. Women like Olivia Culpo, aka Miss Universe 2015, who looks like she doesn’t eat much other than 3 salad leaves paired with Gywneth Paltrow’s famous magic smoothie per day, but who it appears allegedly eats pasta and wine for breakfast.
Or Italian singer/blogger Patricia Manfield.
Now, it would appear that this trend, like all of the others, has a few unwritten rules to it.
Firstly, you need to be wearing bright red lipstick, thereby showing that you are, in fact, so superhumanly fabulous that you can actually delicately slurp in a strand of spaghetto, Lady-and-the-Tramp style, without disrupting your lipstick, while most of us can’t even get through a bowl of pasta carbonara without looking like we just committed cannibalism.
I mean, look at this. This just isn’t fair.
If you are not yet chic enough for the red lipstick challenge, you can get by with just wearing oversized glasses and/or earrings that look like they belong at the MET gala and not Tony’s Famous Meatball Sundays.
It’s also perfectly acceptable to simple stare at the pasta, contemplatively, as though you’ve just realized it’s the love of your life.
A love that you can really bring home by blowing it a kiss before you put it in your mouth. Definitely just indicating that you love pasta, not showing off your cleavage or puckered lips (no shame here, we all do it, but the charade is still funny).
When all else fails, you can always just make your eyes really wide, as though you’re actually surprised you’ve found yourself in the middle of eating pasta.
If you’re a man, you don’t need to worry, because quite frankly none of these rules apply to you.