“My eyes are starting to wander… How can I avoid scratching the itch to have an affair?”
Unfortunately, it’s a common question that married men ask themselves. But first things first: Don’t beat yourself up over a few wayward glances—it’s okay to look. We’re only human, after all, and you can’t prevent your eyes from feasting on certain scenery.
The best way to prevent the rest of your body from following suit, however, is to rekindle a sense of novelty in your relationship. Here’s how. And it also wouldn’t hurt to know these strategies for making your marriage last forever.
Start the action outside the bedroom
Having sex in new places makes it unlikely that you’ll follow old patterns. You’ll be amazed what a simple change of scenery will do to ignite your passions. And for more expert advice into the subject of infidelity, here are the biggest reasons why men cheat.
Watch porn with her
Sounds crazy, I know. But the truth is that many women like it. In fact, 40 percent of those in a recent Stanford University study admitted to watching it when they were alone. (If that’s not convincing enough, check out the recent data dump by the website Pornhub.) And most of them reached peak arousal within minutes of hitting Play. In fact, watching porn with your spouse is one of our recommended ways to spice up your sex life.
Yes, it sounds obvious. But try kissing for 30 seconds, twice a day, and see what happens. You’ll find that good, old-fashioned, high-school-style lip-locking is the first thing to go when sexual desire wanes, and reintroducing it will reestablish an emotional connection between the both of you.
Consider the consequences too
Having an affair isn’t what’s most damaging to a relationship. Keeping it a secret is. If you hide things from your wife, your marriage will become adversarial and you’ll think about changing the cast of characters.
Is that worth the scratch?
Frank Pittman, M.D. Dr. Pittman is the author of Private Lies: Infidelity and the Betrayal of Intimacy.
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