40 Items Every Man Over 40 Should Have in His Home

Yes, you should have a guest bedroom and full shaving kit by now.

40 Items Every Man Over 40 Should Have in His Home

Yes, you should have a guest bedroom and full shaving kit by now.

You instantly know when a home belongs to a man over 40. Every room has been filled just the right furniture, just the right supplies, just the right electronics—all of which combines to ooze an elevated sense of tastefulness, responsibility, warmth, and maturity. So if you’re a man in your 40s and your domicile doesn’t have anything in the list below, do yourself a favor and get that credit card smoking today. And while you’re at it, make sure you don’t have hidden away any of these 40 things no man in his 40s should own.

tailored suit, over 40

1
A Tailored Suit

One that actually fits your body. Once you’ve got a handle on that, expand your palate and try one of these 10 suits from Tallia Orange to energize your days.

How to write a check with a fountain pen up close; over 40

2
Pens That Weren’t Stolen from a Hotel


You’re old enough to have some pens on your desk that don’t say “Hampton Inn.” Develop your own signature, both literally and metaphorically, and you’ll stand out and impress your colleagues and boss. If you’re frequenting hotels for business, though, make sure you know the best way to get your hotel room comped.

toolbox, over 40

3
A Toolbox


One that includes at least a hammer, a tape measure, a level, pliers, and at least two types of screwdrivers (slotted and Phillips-head). Not enough to build a boat, but enough tools to hang a picture without needing to call Dad.

coffee maker chemex over 40

4
A Coffeepot


No “pods” or espresso machines. We’re talking about coffee that’s black and strong and is dripped into a pot through coffee beans, like nature intended. If you’re new to that whole deal, we’ve got you covered: Try one of these 15 best coffee makers on the planet.

 

read books over 40

5
Books That You Weren’t Required to Read in High School or College


You should have figured this out by now, but those books don’t count. The ones that matter are the books you discovered on your own, and live on your bookshelf like trophies.

whiskey, over 40

6
A Bottle of Expensive Booze You’re Saving for a Special Occassion


Wine, champagne, whiskey, scotch—whatever your poison of choice is, you should always be ready for a spontaneous celebration.

WD 40 oil, over 40

7
WD-40


Stop pretending that squeaky bathroom door doesn’t annoy you and fix the damn thing.

small plant, over 40

8
A Living Plant


Not “just barely clinging to life because you haven’t watered it in weeks.” A healthy, vibrant plant that’s getting exactly as much sun as it needs. A plant is a notch below goldfish in the anybody-can-keep-this-alive sliding scale of responsibilities.

Dirty clothes, what to give up in your 40s, over 40

9
A Hamper


Nobody wants to see your dirty clothes in a big filthy pile on the floor. Invest in a receptacle that not only makes laundry easier but is also easier on the eyes. Don’t leave your laundry till the last minute, either—but if you’re having trouble kicking that habit, stock up on the best men’s underwear you can buy on Amazon.

 

red wine, over 40

10
Real Wine Glasses


If you’re spending more than $6 on a bottle of wine, you should be drinking it out of something more sophisticated than a red plastic cup or a juice glass. Something with a stem and an inward curve at the top so you can focus on the aromas.

work gloves, over 40

11
Oil-Stained Work Gloves


Definitive proof that you’re not afraid of a little hard labor.

cash, over 40

12
Cash


Think of it like insurance: You hope you don’t need it, but it’s there if you do. (Just don’t hide it under your mattress. That’s the “I’ll leave my keys in my shoes while I go swimming” of financial security.) There’s also the incentive that real men carry cash.

vaporizer, over 40

13
A Vaporizer (If You’re So Inclined)


When you’re in college, it’s fine to own a 5-foot bong covered in Dead stickers that you nicknamed “The Wizard’s Staff.” But that time has passed.

lantern, over 40

14
A Lantern


Just in case the power goes out. A flashlight works too, but it’s not nearly as cool.

shaving, over 40

15
A Full Shaving Kit


Disposable razors have no place in your bathroom. Get yourself a safety razor, like adult males use, and other grooming staples like shaving cream and after-shave balm—and, if you want to get fancy, a shaving brush.

chef's knife, over 30

16
A Chef’s Knife


Add one of these to your kitchen and every other piece of cutlery you’ve ever used will suddenly seem like a butter knife. Sharp and reliable kitchen knives are one of the 20 purchases that are always worth the money.

Cuban cigars, over 40

17
Cuban Cigars


We’re not endorsing smoking, but sometimes a fella needs to celebrate with a cigar. And when that happens, you sure as hell shouldn’t be puffing on Swisher Sweets. Get a box of Cubans while they’re still legal.

stereo, over 40

18
A Stereo That Rattles the Floorboards


A Bluetooth speaker is no way to experience the music you love, especially if said music includes a bass guitar. Upgrade to a stereo system that makes you lose yourself in some glorious noise.

man bathrobe, over 40

19
A Bathrobe and Slippers


It’s the hard working man’s well deserved weekend uniform. If it worked for Tony Soprano, it can work for you.

journal, over 40

20
A Paper Journal


A blog is just a cry for attention. But a journal that you write by hand and hide in a desk drawer is something meaningful, which your grandkids will obsess over someday.

 

Eggs on spinach, over 40

21
A Cast-Iron Skillet


If there’s any recipe that can’t be made on a skillet, it ain’t worth making. And don’t forget the rest of these 25 kitchen gadgets every man needs.

armchair, over 40

22
Your Favorite Chair that Nobody Else Can Touch


Archie Bunker may have been a loud-mouthed bigot, but he got at least one thing right. A man needs his own chair, and the world’s meatheads need to stay the hell away from it.

knife, over 40

23
A Pocket Knife


The rustier the better. If it looks like you’ve been using the same knife you had as a Boy Scout, you’ve got male street cred.

 

over 40

24
Exercise Equipment that Wasn’t Bought at 3am from a TV Infomercial


Sorry for the spoiler alert, but the Abdominizer has never given anybody rock hard abs, and its continued presence in your garage is more embarrassing than boxes filled with dog-eared old Playboys. Get rid of it, and invest in the single best cardio machine ever.

over 40

25
All the Ingredients for an Old Fashioned


Here’s something an adult male should never say to a guest at his house: “Angostura bitters? Sorry, no, I don’t have that. Can’t I just throw a few ice cubes into a glass of bourbon and call it a day?” You should have in stock all the ingredients necessary for the 20 cocktails every man should know how to make.

Side gigs guest room, over 40

26
A Place for Guests to Sleep that Isn’t a Couch


Don’t make your mom check into a hotel when she comes to visit. Set up a space for her with a little privacy, and a bed that won’t destroy her back.

 

over 40

27
A Pair of Sneakers Close to Disintegrating


Sometimes a man has to go outside in less than ideal weather conditions. Rain, sleet, snow, whatever. You need something to strap to your feet that’s a step above an old shoebox tied around your ankles with string.

Dog friend, over 40

28
A Dog


A well trained canine cohort that gets you in ways that nobody else does. If you need help making one of the most important life decisions, here’s how to buy the perfect dog.

over 40

29
A Filthy, Fully-Slobbered Tennis Ball


Because your dog bestie deserves only the very best.

over 40

30
A Matching Towel Set


You don’t have to get them monogrammed or anything. But a nice set of matching microfiber towels announces to visitors, “I don’t live in a fraternity house.”

over 40

31
A Cordless Drill


If there’s drilling to be done, it shouldn’t matter if there’s an outlet nearby.

over 40

32
A Smoke Alarm with Working Batteries


That’s right, you chirping motherfucker. A 20-year-old would’ve ignored you, but this 40-something bastard isn’t going to pretend your incessant “beeps” aren’t eating away at his soul for even one more minute.

over 40

33
One Real Piece of Art


No, your Jessica-Alba-as-a-stripper Sin City movie poster doesn’t count. Get something classy that Mom would admire, and then you can set your sights on one of the 8 handmade watches that double as works of art.

over 40

34
A Tent


A guy should be able to sleep under the stars at a moments notice, whether it’s in his own backyard or a road trip away.

over 40

35
A Pair of Ripped, Mud-Covered Jeans


Not the kind you pay $425 for at Nordstrom. Jeans that you’ve personally decimated over many years.

giorgio armani private bag, over 40

36
A Packed Overnight Bag


You should always be prepared for a spontaneous road trip, whether it’s fishing with your buddies or a “let’s just disappear for a few days” romantic adventure with your best gal—maybe invest in one of these 10 cool campers that beat a hotel room any day.

over 40

37
A Camera


Your phone doesn’t count. An old-school camera, the kind that neither texts nor has a wifi connection, and that requires mastering the art of patience.

over 40

38
A Baseball Glove


A game of catch can happen anywhere, with little or no warning. A nephew makes an unexpected visit, and suddenly you’re in the back yard, looking for a male bonding ritual. Never be the guy who has to catch the ball bare-palmed, because you “haven’t had a glove since high school.”

bathtub

39
A Bathtub You Could Eat Eggs Off Of


Nobody’s saying you need to eat eggs off of a bathtub. That would be gross. We’re just talking about the general hygienic condition of your bathroom. If you’ve cleaned it to an extent where a breakfast served on the linoleum surface isn’t the most disgusting thing you can imagine, then you’re making some overall good life choices.

bedroom

40
A Bed with a Headboard


Or as grown-ups call it, “a bed.”

Once you’ve acquired all of these essentials and gotten rid of the hold-outs from your 20s, turn your attention to your vocabulary: Here are the 40 things men over 40 should never say.

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